I wish a video existed of Sally and Mike’s wedding ceremony that I led on August 11th, 2007. In fact, scratch that, I wish a video existed not just of the wedding ceremony but of me in the moments before the wedding ceremony.
If such a video existed, you would have been able to see me working with the venue to organise the ceremony area and advising them to adjust the lighting a little so I could read my script and so that everyone could see one another (we were in a darkened Buddhist temple).
You would have been able to see the way that I chatted with the guests, letting them know what they needed to do, and what they didn’t need to do. You would have seen me giving advice to the groom, sharing a joke and making him feel nothing but ready and excited for Sally to make her entrance. You would have seen me guiding Sally and Mike through the ceremony and their vows, and bringing the ceremony to an end with lots of happy tears and hugs.
The reason I would want to see this video is because what nobody knew was that Mike and Sally’s wedding ceremony was my first EVER wedding ceremony. Not even Mike or Sally knew. And do you know why that was? (aside from me not telling them!) It was because I acted as though it wasn’t.
It’s because I used every ounce of confidence that I had, to walk in there and do a job as though I had done it a thousand times before. I don’t doubt that it wasn’t my best ceremony ever, but I know I did a good enough job for Mike and Sally and that they loved it so much. This is an extract that I received from Sally by email a week after their ceremony.
“We would like to thank you so much for a fantastic ceremony that was exactly what we wanted and how beautifully you tailor-made the ceremony for us. You really did get a feel for us which made things so special. So many people have told us that it was the best wedding ceremony they have been to and how meaningful, interesting, unique and refreshing your ceremony was. Everyone thought it was a perfect choice of ceremony for us and they also thought the delivery was superb and highly professional. People also said that you are beautiful and stunning lady! (very true). We had a brilliant wedding which was all down to you and your expert detail. We would also like to thank you for your excellent guidance and thoroughness for detail which made it so perfect. I’m very touched that my mam has contacted you, which again, reflects just how much the ceremony you crafted for us was enjoyed and appreciated. I didn’t know until we got back that my mam had done this. My family were profoundly honoured that we had remembered in the ceremony those that could not be with us, and again that was down to you guiding us through what at the beginning seemed so daunting, but you made it a joy to work through.”
Sally and Mike
This was my first EVER ceremony. I’m not saying this boastfully, but factually.
Was I any better than other celebrants? Maybe, but probably not.
Was I more professional than other celebrants? Probably not.
Was I more expert than other celebrants? Hell no!
Was I more experienced than other celebrants? NO! It was my first ever wedding!
Was I more popular than other celebrants? At that time, no!
So what did I do to make that ceremony a success?
Apart from my basic skills and research into leading a ceremony (I’m untrained), what made me get those happy results and that stunning thank you email was CONFIDENCE and SELF BELIEF.
It was the confidence to put myself out there as a celebrant.
It was the confidence I had in how I marketed myself.
It was the confidence to set the same prices as other more established celebrants.
It was the confidence to write and lead a ceremony like it was something I had been doing for years.
It was the confidence to speak to clients like I knew what I was doing at all times (even when I didn’t).
And by the way, this confidence does not reside in me all of the time (at all). Confidence flows and ebbs and comes and goes, but learning how to power up your confidence and your self belief, are key to being that celebrant that you need to be.
And confidence isn’t just for new celebrants either. Confidence is a quality that is needed during every stage of your celebrant career. Confidence is what takes more established celebrants to their next awesome. Confidence is what helps them to raise their prices and keep to them. It’s what helps them to stick to their principles for who they are as a celebrant and helps them to run their business in a self-assured way.
If I didn’t believe in myself, Mike and Sally wouldn’t have believed in me. If I didn’t have faith in myself, then Mike and Sally wouldn’t have had faith in me. If what you’re projecting to the world, isn’t aligned with how you’re feeling on the inside then others will notice. It will show in your marketing, your sales process and in every single facet of your celebrant business.
How confident are you as a celebrant? Take my confident celebrant test and find out your results.
And head here to read more about my six week, live online, Confident Celebrant Course that’s starting in October and how I can hands-on help you to be the best and most confident celebrant that you can be. And this sensitive early bird booking code ebbcc2019 will get you 15% off the course price.
If you can conquer your confidence and self-belief, you can be the celebrant you want to be and achieve the success that you want to have.
Natasha x
